Late Night Thoughts.

"Regrets collect like old friends
Here to relive your darkest moments
I can see no way, I can see no way
And all of the ghouls come out to play
And every demon wants his pound of flesh
But I like to keep some things to myself
I like to keep my issues drawn
It's always darkest before the dawn

...Shake it out."

I was listening to Florence and the Machine the other day. 

The song, "Shake It Out" stuck with me.

I've said before how music is a large part of my life. What I mean when I say that, is that it has helped me through some pretty dark times. Some pretty rough days.

The lyrics above, sum up a situation I was in, recently. 

I agree with the part, "I like to keep some things to myself". Therefore, I am not going to share that part, however, just because I don't voice every intimate detail of my life, doesn't mean that I don't have my share of struggles or hard times. I do.

They may differ from others, but they are there.

This post, is for anyone that is struggling. Struggling with something...anything. And as alone as we may feel, I can bet  that the majority of you are silently raising your hands as you read this. We are human. We all have times when we feel down, defeated, sad, hopeless and scared. The comforting detail is that you are not alone.  The truth is, we are all damaged in some way. We all have faults and problems, things we are ashamed of and insecurities. We all struggle. I think there is something important about being kind to strangers. You never know what that stranger is suffering. They may smile even though they are hurt, sad, grieving...or aching. 

   People walk by you everyday. You may nod your head and say hello. They might smile back. What we don't know, is their sadness. Their hurt or suffering. People do not wear name tags that say, "My name is _________, today, I am struggling with _________." But they very well may be.

     A little bit ago, I was going through something. And the days seemed dark and hopeless. I felt defeated. Worn down and alone. I smiled and went about my days. But inside, I was hurt. And I realized something as I was walking through a sea of people at the store. I realized, that there are many of us that do just this. Ty is more perceptive than I am. He sees things that I miss. For instance, while walking through the store, he'll tell me that one woman said, "She has the prettiest hair, I wish I had her hair." Or he'll over hear a girl say to another at the pool, "She is hot, I wish I looked like her after having a baby." These compliments are very gracious. And yet they had no clue about what I was going through. They had no idea that I would give anything take away the pain that I was enduring in that moment. They had no clue that I would look at others and say, "I wish I could truly smile as they are, today."
That is the problem with many of us. We look around and see what we don't have. We find that in others and think the grass is always greener. But this is not the reality of it.

     You are not alone. When you feel lonely, remember that we are all children of God and that we all have struggles and problems. I just want to tell all of you, that if you are sad today, or scared, or hurting or defeated...I want you to go to sleep tonight knowing that you are not alone. And tomorrow, wake up in the storm,  knowing that you can adjust your sails. You can. It is as easy and as complicated as that.

I don't know if this makes any sense. I guess if it does, than you are one of the many that I am talking to. This is what was on my heart tonight. And if it helps just one person, than I am thankful. I'm heading to bed with these lyrics in my head, 

"And I've been a fool and I've been blind

                                         I can never leave the past behind

I can see no way, I can see no way

I'm always dragging that horse around

And our love is pastured such a mournful sound

Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground

So I like to keep my issues drawn

But it's always darkest before the dawn"

Take a listen to this amazing song. Goodnight friends...

(Don't forget to pause music at the bottom of the page if you would like to listen.)


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